A morning with Pseudo-Suri

It was an exhausting time in New York for Fashion Week......but that didn't stop me from collecting all the gossip from the week that was.

According to the Daily Mail Madonna's four children spend time with their superstar mum in 15 minutes pre-scheduled sessions.  "The children are said to have appointments made to see their mother, who will help with homework, or sing, or even make food with them - but only if it has been planned in advance"

First of all I think it is ridiculous when parents want to spend every waking hour with their children.  And second of all when your Mothers new boyfriend is only 24 and she is 53 then 15 minutes of embarrassing moments is more than enough for one day.

Shouldn't someone be addressing the real problem here - Why poor Mercy thinks dressing as a ladybug and wearing a helmet is suitable beach attire? And here I was thinking Shiloh is the only one screaming out for attention in a Rainbow family.

Oh there are so many things that disturb me about this picture.......to begin Julia Roberts is screaming Trailer Trash Chic.  From the canvas slip-ons, jeans with holes and the missing button on her husbands shirt........she is clearly a lost cause!

In recent times Julia has moved her family to New Mexico, my sources tell me to a pre-Columbian pueblo compound.  This search of a 'simple life' is having drastic effects on her daughter.

When your first name is Hazel and your last name is Moder don't you think Julia has already given her daughter enough challenges.  I used to have a mutual respect for Julia, but taking your daughter out  in public wearing shorts, cotton, velcro and wayward hair is is just nasty!

Fun fact - My name means "Princess" in Hebrew, clearly Hazel and I have been given different opportunities.

Speaking of Trailer Park Chic here is poor Violet and Mrs Afleck.  Tom tells me Mr Afleck has been struggling of late in the box office and the cracks are beginning to show!

Where is the logic Mrs Afleck?  You can hire a private jet but cannot afford decent pants or I don't know..............maybe a melt to hold up those ghastly jeans?

I have to admire and appreciate Violet's commitment to all that purple!  Being a fellow worldly traveller I understand the importance of dressing comfortably.  But lets not kid ourselves here, clearly Violet has a lot to learn.......there is expectation in fashion choices when your father owns a Private Jet!

Oh it gets so tiresome being perfect sometimes!

In baby news this week January Jones welcomed her first child on September 13, a boy Xander Dane Jones.  Her people told my people 'that January is looking forward to this new chapter in her life as a single mum'.  I am looking forward to the first release of Xander's baby pictures so the inevitable speculation and rumors about who the baby's father can really begin!

Look to a certain extent, paternity rumors can be a great publicity stunt.  It does add a hint of mystery and intrigue to an otherwise textbook pregnancy.  You may recall that Katie's pregnancy with me was filled with rumors, but now no-one disputes that Tom is regrettably, my father.

My people informed me this week that Kris Kardashian is an avid reader of my Sunday Posts so I am sure we will be seeing some Paternity questions surrounding a certain Kim soon in the press given all the publicity it attracts.

Although I do feel that all baby matters should be taken off the table for Kim until someone can teach her that Lois is not for carrying a child in.  Poor Mason thrown into the world of reality Trash television with that over competitive family family he belongs to.

There is no amount of therapy that could counteract years of living in the Kardashian family!

Must be off time to oversee Katie's couture selection for the upcoming Emmy's and God knows how long and exhausting that process is going to be!!

Now someone hand me my tiara......

PS xx